I can do all things through him who strengthens me. (Philippians 4:13) puzzle piece four.

But as my faith matured more I thought back on those ways I had served, and I questioned if, as I did that service, I was really loving those I was serving and showing God’s presence. Or was I doing it because I liked the activity or God required it of me and I needed to check off another Corporal Works of Mercy box? Now, as I’m embarking on a Kairos Outside weekend as the Music team member, another thing Judy Collins has pulled me into, I know God will show me more (like Carol Raza said in her workshop a couple Sundays ago, more, there’s always more) and provide opportunities to connect to these hurting women in love rather than me just checking off the prison work of mercy box. I have come to know for sure that God will love me and I am His child no matter what. I don’t have to do all these things to earn His love but because I love Him I want to do what He asks and show His presence to the world. I know these callings are the very best path for my life and I trust that. 

So with that background, how did I end up searching for a Lay religious order or Third Order? First question I had was why are they called third order? In general, first order are friars, the second order is nuns. third order can be diocesan clergy and lay people who want to follow a particular rule of life. After some disappointments with the Cursillo community and joining groupings with people who didn’t stay committed, I read something about a Poor Clare community that lay people could join. So I researched it. I was attracted to St. Clare because of my and my kids years at St. Clare school and church. Plus she was a friend to St Francis, who always attracted me with his connection with God’s creatures. But it turned out they were not local. Then an article came out in the Florida Catholic about Lay Orders. God was pointing me to another piece of the puzzle. Here was a chance to join a community that would nurture my faith like Cursillo did but required a stronger commitment to the Order’s rule and its community. 

I eventually learned there were several lay order communities along the east coast of Florida. The Orders often have a name related to the founding saint, like the Franciscans, Benedictines, Dominicans, Augustinians and each identifies with a certain aspect of the life of Jesus. Franciscans talk of poverty and peace, Dominicans of truth and proclaiming the Word of God, Augustinians of love of God and of neighbor, Benedictines of prayer and work. Jesuits are known for their zeal in defending the Church and their obedience to the Pope. Carmelites identify with the presence of God. Their name came from the location where it was first established, Mt. Carmel. I learned that most third orders require several years of formation and then a commitment to attend monthly community meetings and the various daily prayer practices of the Order like mass, Divine Office, Lectio Divina, rosary. During discernment, you take time to learn the charisms of the various orders, identify the one that will ‘fit’ the best, and determine what motivates you to think God is calling you to that particular Order. Prayer is essential to making the choice. 

The closest Lay community I found was the Third Order Carmelites, meeting at Holy Name in West Palm Beach. At the first meeting I visited, the opening prayer was very familiar, the Holy Spirit Prayer, same as Cursillo. They were doing a book study of The Way of Perfection by Carmelite Teresa of Avila, same saint I learned about years ago on my silent weekend. As I learned their spirituality, I was attracted to the prayer practices that deepen our relationship in God’s presence while living an active, busy life in the midst of the world. The ‘still small voice’ of personal dialogue with the Lord, as Elijah explained. Mary, as Our Lady of Mt Carmel, joins Elijah as Carmelite role models.  Contemplative prayer is a gift from God, less dependent upon what we do (like in vocal or meditative prayer) and more on what God does in us. St. Teresa of Avila explains it as a conversation with a friend. Another Carmelite saint, Elizabeth of the Trinity, came to know that the Trinity dwelled within her and she was in constant communication with them and her contemporary St. Therese, the little flower, understood that God does not judge our actions on their greatness, or even their success, but on their motivation by love. All of these Carmelite saints and their words touched deep desires in me. I want all of it, constant awareness of God’s presence in me, friendly conversation with God and neighbor, doing everything for love and with love. Those are the charisms of the Carmelites: Prayer, Community, Action.

How much commitment is there for the lay Carmelites, you wonder? There are 3 years of formation with monthly classes in Carmelite Spirituality. The first year is a more general look at the Order, and you may conclude at that point it’s not for you. If you want to proceed there are 2 more years of deeper study. I found the content very interesting and thought provoking and the follow up discussion in class added different points of view and experiences. Following your temporary profession after 3 years, you are asked to live the Carmelite life for an additional 3 years before making a final profession. Joan Hayes, a fellow Cursillista, made her final profession this morning. Once a month there are community meetings (mass + 3 hours of sharing, praying, book study, eating). The Stella Maris Lay Carmelite community I belong to also has a Prayer group, sponsors the annual celebration of the feast of Our Lady of Mt. Carmel, and attends occasional retreats. Most action is done individually and many of us are involved in multiple ministries.

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